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welcome to my blog :)) ♥ || blogs for the sake of blogging || enjoys free writing so say hi to grammatical errors ^-^|| blessed to have an amazing best friend, ENNA CYMBELINE GLANG TATO ♥♥ ♥♥ her much.much ^-^ || and a kickass bartender best friend, LORENZO MIGUEL SALAZAR || "busy" but tries to update|| not a fashionista || free-spirited || ♥ laugh || ♥ having fun || ♥ colors || ♥ NBA || ♥ outdoor activities|| ♥TRIMMOC (Tribung MIndanaw Mountaineering Club) Member|| get a glimpse of my twisted mind through my posts || future chemical engineer || ultimately in love with FOOD || chef in the making || will save lives in the future || ♥ life and ultimately, i want to be FOREVER YOUNG ♥
email me for comments/etc: glycerilkaye@yahoo.com :)

break the ice

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TALK.

♘♔ is this a desperate cry for help?

Wednesday, September 11, 2013 @ 1:35 PM

sometimes, I just want to kill myself.
No, seriously, I don't tell this to anyone because I don't want to be labeled as attention-grabber or something.

This is the part where i don't understand myself. I mean, I have THE perfect life. But what the hell am I doing? why am i throwing it away? why am i digging my own grave? why do I have many absences? why am I always late? Why am I not motivated as I was before? Why can't I change myself? Why am I like this? why? WHY??!?!!!!??

i don't know what is wrong with me. why am i like this. sometimes, I just want to kill myself. I feel like banging my head at the wall. I have nothing to rebel about, i mean, i have the most supportive slash awesome parents ever!. i have the best

group of friends anyone could as for. i mean hello?! i can eat three or more times a day, i am complete, i have aircon, i have a laptop, i have globe tatto, i have cellphones, i have load. i mean, not to brag but i do kinda have the life i know that. but why am I like this? i know that i should take my studies seriously but why am I not? what is wrong with me? huhu..

can i like, die for now and be reborn into someone better?

do i need the iron mouth of my mom to wake me up every morning and push me to go to school? do i need to be whipped by my father to study for my exams?
do i need someone to be strict and reprimand me all the time?

is this the effect of not going home for like, months ? i could only speculate, i could only have theories. gah. this is so hard...

how can i be motivated? i mean, i know where i'm wrong and i know what i should do but sometimes, i just don't know how to do it. i don't know how to implement it. oo na, ganyan ako ka loser. hahayy...

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